Gone

One morning, during my last semester in college, I received an early phone call from my mom. She was in tears and I didn't know what was going on. She told me that a guy I grew up with, my mom's best friend's son, had died. This was in February of 2002. I couldn't believe it. He was in the Marines, stationed in San Diego. He had a wife, 3 stepchildren, and a son of his own that was not quite two years old.

Growing up, my sister and I were thrown together with him and his sister. He was one year older than me, and his sister was one year older than Krista. His mom was the 4 year old Kindergarten teacher, and my mom was the 3 year old Kindergarten teacher. His dad lived in another state, my dad lived in another city. Although I was never BFF with him, I knew him and his family well. My school was small, everyone knew everything about everyone. We both attended ICS from 5K to 12th grade. His mom was like a second mom to me. The relationship between him and I could be described almost like a cousin-type relationship.

It has been almost 4 years since he passed. It was sudden. He had died in his sleep. He had a son. It broke my heart. I remember his memorial service vividly. As I got out of the car and walked towards the Church, I saw his wife standing outside. She was dressed in black, and was smoking a cigarette. She had no tears. My face was red. I gave her a hug. I felt so bad for her. To be lying next to him when he died. To wake and find him not breathing. The thought was haunting. I did not understand why she wasn't crying, but then again, this was the third memorial service that week that she had to bear.

Wednesday night, 3 years, 9 months, and 12 days after his death, his wife was arrested for homicide. She poisoned him. She killed the father of her youngest child. She lost her rights to all 4 of her children on Wednesday. She was locked up, no bail.

Like I said yesterday, I do not know the answers. I do not know how such evil can be inside a person. I don't understand what possessed her to do it. I don't know how long it had been planned. I do know, however, that he was a good man. It was the most tear-filled memorial I have ever been to. He was loved and his loss was felt by many. My heart breaks for his son. My heart breaks for his mom. My heart breaks for his stepchildren. All four of them face difficult futures. I pray for them to be taken care of in the best possible way. I do not know where they will go, if they will stay together, or if they'll ever want to see their mother again. I do not know what is going to happen to her.

Yesterday, it was like he died again.